Lisa (£)™

(-pounding-on-sails-today-post-)

Ilsa is a pretty (short) name. You would not name your (any of your) son(s) Ilsa (probably) but you could if you decided to go that route. That route would include lots of teasing about the name for a girl that was given to a boy. That is something that is bound to cause trouble later on when folks tell the person with the name how it is “wrong” to have that name. Well, wrong or not, a name is given by someone and often it is not the person (or other entity) that will have to “tolerate” that name as being like unto one’s own identity. [suggest song here]

You are not actually the same as your name. It is just the audible “label” we use to make it “clear” who it is we mean when we refer to you. This applies to me as well of course. Obviously, this is not particularly informative: everyone realizes names are merely external references to ourselves, at least subconsciously.

So for whatever reason, we can all (if we wish) agree that short and pretty names are the handiest and nicest of them all, as long as they are not sources of confusion. To avoid confusion, we need uniqueness amongst ourselves, since we realize that we actually are each unique individuals. Even with identical twins there is not an exact matching of every single trait or characteristic, neither inward nor outward (including the belly-buttons!) is found in any example.

WE ARE EACH ONE-OF-A-KIND!!!!

Again, this is usually fairly well-known and accepted. If I were like some people, I would organize this hodgepodge little tid-bits of ersatz wisdom, and maybe borrow or steal some real truth from some good source(s), and then write myself some nifty best-sellers and give away most of the windfall proceeds. Then I’d give credit to my creator, and be completely full of hogwash and bound for the oven.

Good luck with that idea, Rick.

Meanwhile, Lisa was my first and best (and at times only) friend on the web, back in the earlier days before the pre-fall of 2001 and the “near-to-middle-eastern influence” — or some evil spirit perhaps even if no such thing can rationally or logically or scientifically exist — split the heart of mankind into dystrophic spasms of denial, and I wish to contemplate her Wisdom Hiding Inner Beauty And Spritual Strength (WHIB-ASS)™ for however much time this atheistic nation is permitted to endure longer.

For insanity’s sake, I must pretend to address her, here and now, with words:

Lisa, that man will suffer for his misdeeds, and then he will be no more a man, nor will he be the overgrown boy that he really is, nor will he be. Nobody could want to avenge you more than someone who truly loves you unconditionally with loyalty and faith and dedication, which you thought he had for you, spoken in some VOW before some Creator he claims to know; and I can only imagine being blessed with having that privilege and responsibility, and I never was nor will be, and I know it, surely and sadly.

The “come-uppance” is not something any of us will be dishing out; it comes another way, and not from someone like me who is merely “feeling” outrage at what someone did to YOU and not to me. My anger is totally misplaced, yet it is real. I will do nothing with it except to know why it is there.

No Denial, ND. That could be my dream town, if it existed. Eventually, every sentence will be in the past tense, since everything will have happened, with nothing left to “come to pass” if it is all past and has been passed into the past.

So the point was that Lisa is Ails, Sail, Ilsa, and other sequences which seem unfamiliar, like slia, sila, and so forth. When we were spending time “together” with hundreds of miles between us, many months ago, it was nothing short of amazing to see what emerged during the conversations. But after all the good times, the result, in the end, due to neglect on my part and then misbehaving badly in the aftermath of that (things can really get screwed up if we do not pay attention) the result of it all is someone feeling like this, about me, for being the negative factor in the happiness debacle.

Just see how UNglad people have been to know me for very long, and realize that you are fortune if you choose not to continue paying any attention to such a cruel-hearted monster (like you seem to be doing right now, in fact). Lisa would have done better to pull out her own fingernails than to have used them to type any words on the computer to me. LOOK:
=+=+=+=+=+=+=+=+=+=+=+=+=+=+=+=+=+=+=+=+=+=+=+=+=+=+=+=+=+=+=

Another example, totally unrelated: about six years ago, I developed a very unlikely but close friendship with an older man. For several reasons, it didn’t make sense, but try telling that to an independent yet depressed college freshman. We had a lot of fun conversations and a lot of intimate (nonsexual) conversations. We became emotionally codependent. For reasons I can’t fully remember, our friendship eventually began to dissolve. Because we had trusted each other so deeply, we were able to hurt each other deeply. I guess all along, I believed that there was something wrong about the fact that we were so close, but I kept suppressing it until I convinced myself that it was all his fault, that he had sucked me in. Truth be told, he was quite magnetic. Things needed to change, and I did a lot of trying to hate him, and a lot of trying to convince myself that he wasn’t all bad. But he continued to hurt me indirectly with his words. These days, everyone has their own websites where they’re allowed to write whatever they want, but they have to remember that their readers are allowed to be upset by those words. He has created enough emotional distance to allow himself to pass character judgments on myself and my husband that are completely unfounded. A few months ago, I wished that he had never existed. I didn’t want to fully undo that year of my life when we became so close, because that was an extremely important year in my life for other reasons. I just wanted to erase him entirely from my history, replace him with an eternal sunshine. It’s disgusting that someone so far away should be so inextricable. I have held my tongue so many times. He will never know how deeply he has hurt me, and how those wounds have not healed, they have only become scarred.

I’m beginning to realize that this second example was not a good example at all. I don’t know how this man fits into the story God is writing in my life, or how I could possibly have been used in a good way in his story. I know that sometimes God will use negative situations to teach us hard lessons we need to learn, but all I can honestly say that I learned is this: Don’t talk to strangers.

This post didn’t go where I wanted it to.

God has been so faithful to me in amazing ways lately. He is answering prayers that I haven’t even been able to voice – and this is astounding to me. I truly do not deserve it, and I don’t know how to feel about that.

If we died with him,
we will also live with him;
if we endure,
we will also reign with him.
If we disown him,
he will also disown us;
if we are faithless,
he will remain faithful,
for he cannot disown himself.
2 Tim 2:11-13, NIV
Current Mood: [mood icon] pensive

=+=+=+=+=+=+=+=+=+=+=+=+=+=+=+=+=+=+=+=+=+=+=+=+=+=+=+=+=+=+=
She was describing how it seems like she’s made bad choices in relationships, and the primary example is sitting right here. So, if you know what’s good for you, do NOT under any circumstances let yourself wonder why you have bothered with this. Stop bothering. She didn’t, and probably still pays the price. Nothing can fix that mess, which I made with my own evil two-faced heart.

This, from someone who claimed to be aiming to help. I never knew how dishonest I was, until I finallyy slapped myself hard enough.
–g
Nothing yet, I have to pout some more! However, this entire post might go onto the sidebar as a page (something will, surely) leaving only some small remnant behind (left, or right), if that is what “comes to pass” in the urgings of the spirit of [continue]…
(:SMILE:)
(;WINK;)

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About Galen

Nearly over some hills, still a fool on whatever this thing is where I stand
This entry was posted in Anagrams, Beauty, Continuity, Friendship, Love, Musings, Retention, Spirituality, Wordplay, World. Bookmark the permalink.

5 Responses to Lisa (£)™

  1. tearsofmine says:

    hey…left you another note over at my place. 🙂

  2. tearsofmine says:

    oh and i see you took “my” look 😉

  3. Galen says:

    Yes, it (this look) was so breathtaking, I simply finally had to exhale and it blew away my old look! (I can make any look look old in no time… just watch!)

    But now you have changed and already I am looking unlike you again! I must admit (easily) that Benevolence is very becoming when it comes to you, always, so I should not be surprised all this much. 🙂


    –g

  4. tearsofmine says:

    🙂 i like it kinda…trying to get used to it. hahaha…and

    ps: there is a note for you AGAIN. *grin

  5. tearsofmine says:

    *grin
    you have a note waiting for you again….
    you should just expect this by now.
    *grin

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